Vicious Diatribes

Which Balkanization are we trying NOT to allow?

2008-03-15T10:22:00.000-07:00

We wish to avoid the Balkanization of India, says the Supreme court. Which Balkanization are you trying to avoid? How do the following help achieve this lofty goal?

Banning meat sale during Paryushan? [1]
Disallowing meat-eating "Indians" from purchasing houses/flats in vegetarian housing societies? [2]
Disallowing opening of non-vegetarian food catering restaurants in parts of a very "Indian" Mumbai? [3]
Trying to use political muscle to displace fish markets?

The ban on meat-sale during Paryushan report reads like:

The Supreme Court on Friday upheld a Gujarat government order closing slaughter houses for nine days every year during the Jain festival of ‘Paryushan’ and said that non-vegetarians could remain vegetarian for this short period. "The traders in meat of Ahmedabad will not suffer much merely because their business has been closed down for nine days in a year. There is no prohibition to their business for the remaining 356 days in a year," said Justice Katju, writing the judgment for the bench.Asking the communities to be respectful to each other’s sentiments, the bench said: "In a multi-cultural country like our's with such diversity, one should not be over-sensitive and over touchy about a short restriction when it is being done out of respect for the sentiments of a particular section of the society."

WTF? Let us be mutually respective and enforce the condition that all vegetable markets, fruit markets, in fact ban selling anything vegetarian during Ramzan/Id. Or ban selling anything vegetarian during some arbitrary 9-day period. I will respect a vegetarian's sentiment, only when he respects mine. If I can't eat fish for 9 days, you shall not eat your cabbage for 9 days too! Be fair. That's what justice is about. It is not unidirectional respecting of sentiments where and when applicable. No, but I am wrong. I am clouded by the Tandoori and Moghlais I have eaten over the years. What I should be doing is lauding the efforts of such organizations:

From International Vegetarian Union:

But all proponents of vegetarianism do not follow such quiet methods. Last month, this newspaper reported that vegetarians in Juhu-Vile Parle had complained about cold counters stocking meat at a newly furbished super market. When the agitated vegetarians threatened to go about town protesting, the store meekly agreed to put opaque glass to hide the meat counters. The store even offered to shift the counters out of the store.

Some three years ago, vegetarian zealots forced a tandoori restaurant in Matru Ashish building on Napean Sea Road to close operations. Some time back, Vile-Parle residents had protested against the opening of a McDonald’s in their neighbourhood. In some parts of Mumbai, the fear of a backlash from the vegetarian lobby is so great that some hyper markets do not sell non-vegetarian food.

Last year, promoters of a new housing project in Khar said that only vegetarian Hindus from Gujarat would be allowed to buy the expensive flats. In fact, an international real estate agency estimates that one in 100 new buildings in South Mumbai is now strictly off bounds for non-vegetarians. In the suburbs, the proportion is one in 50 and growing.

A Marathi man protesting against influx of a Bihari in Mumbai is NOT OKAY. It is against the constitution. It is unlawful, parochial, idiotic, against national integration, destroys secular, integrated fabric of our great country. Yeah, but allowing segregation of vegetarians and non-vegetarians is the path to unity. It is the great unity-causing force that will destroy the evils of divisive thoughts. Forcing poor fisher-women to abandon markets where they have sold fish, just because it is in the vicinity of a vegetarian housing society is the path to national unity. How can we not understand this? After all vegetarianism is the cure to all violence-causing evils. Non-vegetarianism is based on violence. It breeds violence. It makes you stink, causes your environment to stink, causes you think dirty thoughts. Leave your healthy, protein providing, poly-unsaturated fat providing fish, and eat undhiu. A special report on Google Health News pointed out how eating undhiu was beneficial to the heart. Just like chocolate, I swear!

[1] Abbattoirs to close for Jain festival in Gujarat
[2] Vegetarian rules in housing hunt
[3] Vegetarian vigilantes in Mumbai/cultural tensions soar in meatless zone

2008-03-10T12:47:00.001-07:00

This is something very delightfully angry that I found. What a diatribe, and how true! I wish that such letters are front-page editorials in reputed newspapers than the number of times Britney ran out of toilet paper, or let terrorists like Abu Azmi or court jesters like Amar Singh regurgitate their filth into our ears.

http://mumbaitrainblasts.wordpress.com/

Well rather than doing a plain fact driven stories and blood stained scenes, I have a few points which interested people should look into….I m an avid watcher and follower and I think only you guys can really make a difference to the currently disgusting scenario we all live in..

1. Firstly…ALL MEDIA IS INTERSTED in sensational news…hence coverage is going to continue on What happened , who got affected etc…. DO YOU people know that on an average 20 people die both in central and western railway by falling off trains/ overhead wire shocks, hitting side posts, etc. that figure is more than 5000 annually…

2. If trains are filled 4 times more than capacity , then people are bothered just to get in…..WHO gets in nobody is interested in….HENCE THE FOCUS SHOULD BE ON INFRASTRUCTURE as to people can atleast see each other in the trains rather than blindly jumping to get a foothold.

3. the plight of railway stations is such that it is always filthy, no place to stand, no first aid, no security screening , etc. This is the treatment we DESERVE because we vote for people who dont care about anybody.

4. MUMBAI railway is one of the most profitable sectore but look at the plight of people travelling….also the major network today had been readied by the BRITISHERS whereas our politicians, governments etc have been looking to extend CST - THANE and BORIVILI - VIRAR for teh last 20 years…..without any success…..If you cannot shift simple slum dwellers then how can you possibly screen intelligent perperators of crime……. HAS THE MEDIA EVER questioned the politicains about the attention to Mumbai….THE BIGGEST tax payer but the biggest sucker who gets nothing in return….

5. People will get back to work…and Media will say Mumbai spirit is alive and people are brave to start living normally again. It is because of our TOLERANT nature…the politicians and planners give a damn….thinking that tommorrow these peole will be back and seven days they will forget….DID anybody comeout today and stalll trains demanding safety and travelling in HUMAN conditions…..Has a politicain ever travelled on train to see exactly how if feels to be massaged by 4-5 bodies at atime or hanging on to your life by holding a stray handle…..GOVINDA travelled in an empty train to do a media stunt….I challenge any politician to get in a 6 pm train without support…. THEY WILL COME IN AC cars and shed crocodile tears and RUN to their dens in DELHI……SONIA came last night and is already back….Delhi is clean because of security reasons whereas Bombay is dirty bcoz of votebank politics….. YOU SHOULD JUST TRY TO STAND 5 GUYS IN a 2 FT SQUARE in heat+ humidity and try to push… atleast u will know what it feels in a train

6. Just travel once from VT station to Sewri via the PD MELLO road….you will see on both sides bangladeshi immigrants cornering 80 % of the main road with their beds on the road….On this road the new terminus for the outstation trains isready for the last 2 years but the facilites etc are not shifting… Ask the railway CGM why..

THE MEDIA WILL ALSO FORGET THIS FAST WHEN THEY FIND ANOTHER EXCITING STORY………AND CONVENTIONAL POLITICIANS WILL JUST PLAY TO GALLERY

Forrbees' magazine names NDTV for the most informed journalism

2008-03-05T11:02:00.000-08:00

What follows is what I had written on 05 March, when the article actually had the following text:

Indian cities in Hall of Shame:
7. Mumbai
8. Baghdad
24. Delhi.

I guess someone informed them, and they shamelessly changed the article. Should at least contain an apology, right?

Written on 05 March:

Our correspondent
Mumbai, 05 March 2008:
Following brilliant articles such as the following, Forbes magazine names Mumbai as city of junk, the Forrbes' magazine award for dazzling brilliance in journalism goes to NDTV. The article not only points out at the merits of being ranked lower in filthy cities worldwide, but also includes a comprehensive list of Indian cities in the "hall of shame". In an unprecedented piece of clairvoyant journalism, it goes ahead and includes Baghdad in the list of Indian cities. Needless to say, at NDTV, they believe that since India will eventually rule the world, including Baghdad is a foregone conclusion, albeit a bold move. We congratulate NDTV for continuing its unbiased and factual journalism.

Information Dissemination or Moronic Babbling?

2008-02-16T10:37:00.000-08:00

It is ironic that in a movie (Spiderman) that spawned the highly cheesy catch-phrase, "With great power comes great responsibility", Peter Parker the protagonist was working for a newspaper. I wish there was a real Spiderman, who worked for one or more real newspapers and preached them this sentiment day after day. The biggest source of lies, corruption and hatred in current soceity stems out of media. Just as history can never be unbiased, since it is essentially dictated by those in power, media reporting can never ever be unbiased, since like many other evils in the soceity it is driven by money and the basal desires of instant gratification. How do we ever believe what we read? Do they make journalists take a Hippocratic oath before they start reporting? If a sand particle transformed into gold every time the media lied, the earth would have been shifted out of orbit due to the heaviness of all the gold on it. Thus, essentially every piece of bull shit coming out of the media should be treated as an abstraction of the truth. Gathering a sense of what is "really" happening out of the media articles is like trying to construe the menu of a party from the vomit of several drunk guests. We need laws and lawmakers to provide us with guidelines to allow certain things and ban certain things.

Freedom of press is absolutely over-rated. The press and TV has unbelievable impact on the minds of people subejcted to it. Would you have ever known, cared about, or even given a thought to the frequency with which Britney Spears does *insert generic stupid sounding thing*? In a nation where people have more divorces than children, why do you want to subject the populace to the latest make and break between celebrities? Are you trying to generate a soceity with degenerate principles, defunct ideologies and lack of any creative and moral thinking? It should be possible to organize public forums were journalists are chastised, and demanded answers for writing drivel. It should be possible for XYZ to go up on the stage face to face with "celebrity journalists" and ask them questions like, "What the hell were you thinking?", "Why is this relevant to the world?", "Do you think that you are producing Pulitzer material by speculating the number of times Brad Pitt tied the bib around his baby?"

Still, I am sure there are minds out there who view the celebrity circus as an amusement and entertainment, and keep it at that. Hence, one could possibly argue the comedic value of the circus of these celebrity clown reporters. Granted, they serve a purpose of being the idiots in the kings' court that everyone laughts at. How does one justify the morbid unrighteousness of the so-called political journalists? Considering the tremendous power they wield in making or breaking governments, reputations, individuals and hence soceity in general, shouldn't there be a quality check on them? Everything the soceity consumes has a quality check in place. Medicines, food, movies, clothes - you name it - it has a quality control process and a regulatory body to oversee whether quality is maintained. Why is there no quality control for political journalism? Which brings us to the central point of why this tirade was launched - the ongoing Raj Thackeray debate.

Raj Thackeray did certain things, said certain things, and his party members acted out in a certain way. Reading his interview in Marathi, his and my native language, what he seems to be saying is, in short:

People from U.P. and Bihar (WHICH IS NOT THE ENTIRE NORTHERN INDIA) seem to be immigrating to Mumbai in hordes.
This has caused a severe strain on the infrastructure of the city, pushing it to the very limit - there are 40,000 slums on the city's freaking water supply pipes.
People from U.P. and Bihar (WHICH IS AGAIN NOT THE ENTIRE NORTHERN INDIA), seem to contrive new festivals to celebrate, such as "Uttar Bharat Din", which are merely for the sake of flexing their political muscle.
The jobs for locals are being displaced by so-called U.P. and Bihar lobbies (AGAIN, NOT ENTIRE NORTHERN INDIA), rendering local youth without a job or a chance to get a job.
If political leaders such as Amar Singh and Abu Azmi can say statements like, "We will distribute sticks among U.P., Bihar immigrants", R.T. has responded with saying, "Okay, we will distribute swords then".

In Raj Thackeray's original agenda, I totally sympathize with him on point#2. Do you want your kid to be drinking water polluted with any person's faeces? May that person be Assamese or Keralite or bloody freaking from Hawaii. I wouldn't want it. I am completely pissed off by #3. Suppose Indians in U.S. or U.K. started organizing humungous rallies outside the White house, celebrating a festival that did not exist in India, merely for the purpose of flaunting their clout and numbers, an American or a British person would be offended. People in U.S. or U.K. who are citizens of those countries, but have Indian origin, should and mostly do behave like citizens of that country. A Mexican wishing to emigrate to the U.S. is often asked the question, "In a soccer match between U.S. and Mexico, whom would you support?". You cannot be the citizen of a country just for the money and standard of living . You have to embrace that country's culture, practices, traditions, sports - you name it. At the same time, it doesn't mean you have to destroy your own identity. I know so many Indian origin families, now citizens of the U.S., who invite people for Christmas and Thanksgiving, take interest in American football, and at the same time teach their kids their native tongues, Bharat natyam, and other "cultural" things. Do you think U.S. would tolerate a group of Indians who started driving as if they were in an Indian city, or started spitting on the road besplattering it with Paan stains? Would "copying" in exams be tolerated in U.S.? Would bribery at any level be part of life?

I don't agree so much with 4). I think jobs should be merit-based, and AS LONG AS there is a fair chance to obtain a job for every individual, it shouldn't matter who gets the job. If you feel that people are creating lobbies to prevent you from getting a job, outsmart them. Take a vocational course for 3 months, you will get umpteen jobs. Every labour has dignity. Every job you do for feeding your family is a worthy job. So many Americans work in grocery shops as bag-boys and girls, they don't feel ashamed about it. So many students are part-time waiters/waitresses. They don't feel ashamed. As long as you are ready to work hard and honestly, jobs shouldn't be a problem. To get a steady income might be an issue, for which one should always invest in a good education. It is the reponsibility of every politician to ensure that education at all levels is fairly available to every one.

I won't go off against #5. Irresponsible politicians are the worst scum, and they deserve an entire post.

R.T. said something like, "the tendency of protecting Marathi people has been passed down to me right from my grandfather, and uncle". Some brilliant mind-freak decided to interpret that as, "Raj Thackeray anoints himself a successor of Bal Thackeray". My advice to you Mr.whoever you are, please, never, ever, ever, take the GRE or SAT. You wouldn't get past Question 1 of analytical. (Or an I.Q. test for that matter. They don't have an accurate way of measuring below 30). What the entire biased Hindi and English media seems to pointedly refuse to answer, raise or even acknowledge are burning issues that have prompted this so-called "Ghati-tirade". Students in Bihari LAW SCHOOL protested, went on a rampage and burnt down a college because they weren't allowed to cheat. Would you expect immigrants from Bihar to be nice law-abiding citizens? I know several people hailing from U.P. and Bihar who are simply brilliant, and very advanced in all arenas of education, sports, and arts. I know several brilliant computer scientists from Bihar and U.P. They are the ones that Bihari people have to learn to emulate, not the Lalus and Mulayams of the world.

This "Ghati-outrage" is not a fight against North Indians. It is not a fight against immigrants or outsiders. It is a fight to keep the lawful nature, civic sense, a regional identity and a cultural perspective alive in the world of globalization. Nobody is not acknowledging the efforts of several North Indians in Mumbai, nobody is demeaning them, or asking them to leave. What is being asked is, "When in Rome, at least make a sincere effort to not offend Romans at every chance". Doesn't that seem like a reasonable demand? The actions of Raj's party workers, and the means to convey this message are partially flawed. Unnecessary violence against unsuspecting denizens is unwaranteed. But this one thing has been taken up by the media and BLOWN OUT OF PROPORTION. Do not ignore the KEY ISSUE here. Only a blind man would say that the orderliness of traffic in Mumbai and Patna is the same. Heck, Mumbai and PUNE differ in their traffic-orderliness. The civic sense awareness in Mumbai is much higher. In order for an immigrant to not stick out as a sore thumb, it is necessary to inculcate these Mumbai tendencies in him, rather than the other way around. For me, this is the main point here, and the irresponsible and highly biased media has completely ignored.

As a parting note, let us see what the media actually wants us to believe about what Raj Thackeray said.

OH MY GENTLE JESUS!! Raj Thackeray is a new TEMPLAR!! OMGWTFBBQ!! He has called a CRUSADE against NORTH INDIANS. RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!!!!!
RAJ THACKERAY is HITLER reincarnated!! HELP THE POOR NORTH INDIANS!! There are CONCENTRATION CAMPS in DADAR, where they force the NORTH INDIANS TO actually take a BATH, TWICE A DAY!!
RAJ THACKERAY has put a ban on all forms of PUBLIC CELEBRATION of NORTH INDIANS. He has promised to CUT OFF the LIMBS of any BHAIYA who speaks in HINDI! OUTRAGE?!!!!!!?
RAJ THACKERY has called for 300% RESERVATIONS for bloody GHATIS in all jobs in MAHARASHTRA and the states adjoining MAHARASHTRA.
St.Amar Singh and St.Abu Azmi have led an UNDERGROUND RESISTANCE movement against this oppressive REGIME. It is HIGH TIME they resorted to VIOLENCE!!!

I rest my case. Impose sanctions and public chastisement for untrue and biased reporting.

Hypertension

2008-01-29T12:06:00.001-08:00

I have hypertension. Elevated pressure of the sickly red fluid meandering along the countless pathways bounded by my adipose rich, exercise starved exoskeleton. Before you start the automatic human endeavour of trying to classify a person into known stereotypes, allow me to reduce your efforts by a confession. I am the French fry munching, burger hogging, plump - but would like to be classified as "on the healthier side" - kind of a person. Having an extreme desire to be politically correct, just this once, I refer to myself as not only the weight challenged, but also as possessing a pathological exercise deficiency, chocophiliasis, and a host of such human inadequacies. However, if you have been pushed into thinking that this lack of a regimen in exercising - both a restraint and the body - have been the sole contributors to my hypertension, you, my friend, are severely thought challenged.

To what do I owe my high blood pressure? Is it the impending doom of the world? Is it the pollution in the environment, vanishing species, global warming, political situation in the middle east, bird flu in south east Asia? Or is it the fear of being converted by religious proselityzers into a methodist, a catholic, a jihadi, a Jew, a spiritual, or an atheist? It is no single one of these, and everything of these.

It is the affirmative action and reservation policies in jobs and education that seem to make cheetahs abundant in comparison to the available vacancies for humans of my particular "sect". It is the political leaders that guide the masses, in an admirable power-hungry fashion towards their eventual doom. It is the weakening of the soceity due to these artificial barriers created everyday by everyone and anyone who seems to get hold of a megaphone and an agenda. It surely is enough of a cause to raise the mercury in the sphygmomanometer.

It is the religious propoganda. The Christians telling you about why the non-Christians have an advance booking to the luxury suites in the seventh circle, or the Muslims telling you of the wrath of Allah on the day of judgement. It is the Jews praising the Arabs' mothers, and the Arabs heaping praises on the Jews' sisters. The Hindus trying to show you the way to spirituality or the Buddhists - well the Buddhists have to look all bald and superior - and its enough to cause one's blood to boil.

It is the developed nations that bulldoze over the forests, and the developing nations that seem to struggle to keep their sky blue. The poachers, and the tree-huggers, the capitalists and the communists. Every single human soceity has so many, so diverse and so illogical flaws in every possible way, that the tiny amount of calories in a double Mac with cheese seems to pale in comparison with regard to its blood-pressure increasing power.

I wouldn't even get started on the foibles of human nature. It is perfect to be imperfect, and once you accept this, the fluid dynamics of your vascular system does not seem to be affected by morons, callous brutes, hyper-sensitive tear-reservoirs, hypochondriacal wimps, gung-ho types, two-faced liars, inundaters of posteriors with their own saliva, and so on.

But even all these factors seem to pale in significance - much like the desire for a large sundae would pale when confronted by a hungry lion - when assailed from various quarters by inventions of modern technology. I mean, someone remind me, weren't these inventions supposed to make man's life easier? There are those ridiculous pieces of sotware produced by the heathen spawn that seem to not cause global destruction only when Neptune and Uranus are aligned with a stray asteroid. There are the automated voice response systems, which invite you on a tour of various grammatically correct questions, without providing a definitive answer to any question. There are the Iphones - the phone cum ipod cum tv cum vcr cum dvd player cum vending machine cum barber shop cum abbattoir cum sanitation plant. Who the hell needs that? Give me a fat phone that doesn't crack open when I step on it, and I am happy. Mac Air - the laptop without anything in it, aptly named 'Air'. GPS cum air-conditioner, toilet bowl cum coffee pot. These devices seem to fatten my arteries on the interior and exterior. Oh, and never forget those whose hands seem attached to their ears with phones as adhesives. Yup - soon some brilliant company will come up with the idea of implanting your cell phone in your ear - "never be too far away from being in touch" - or some such corny catch phrase.

The one thing that supercedes all and any of these is my wife having the ringer of her phone off, just after we have fought, or when I need to reach her in an emergency. The very thought of it, ...Yup, pop goes the coronary and whoosh goes the jugular. See you in next life.

Racism (n) [rey-siz-uhm]: A brown man calling another brown man a monkey

2008-01-29T11:41:00.000-08:00

This is something interesting from: Global Issues on Human Rights

In June 1998, One Nation, an Australian nationalist party in Queensland won 25 percent of the votes with their main lines at fighting immigration by non-whites. This was made possible where unemployment was been high and where it was easy to convince the people that immigrants were taking their jobs, as it would serve to be a convenient excuse and avenue to vent frustration. In a speech the party leader said that Australia was “in danger of being swamped” by Asians and she also questioned the special welfare benefits for Australia’s Aborigines. The reaction to that meant the same party won only 6 percent of the votes two months later, in the State elections.

Australia has also had a very racist past in which apartheid has been practiced and where indigenous Aboriginal people have lost almost all their land and suffered many prejudices. In the past, the notorious policy that led to the Stolen Generation was practiced. This was the institutionalized attempt to prevent Aboriginal children (and thus future generations) from being socialized into Aboriginal culture. (This also ocurred in various parts of the Americas too.)

Aborigines are the poorest group in Australia and suffer from very much preventable diseases. For more about these issues, you can start at these harrowing reports from John Pilger a prominent Australian journalist who has been critical of many western policies.

The Sydney 2000 Olympics also brought some of Australia’s racist past and present to the fore. (On the positive side, many parts of Australia’s rich diversity in people is slowly helping relieve prejudism. However, some more traditional and conservative politicians are still openly racist.)

In wake of this, in regard to the Harbhajan fiasco, all I can say is "Wow!" Australians complaining about racism? You got to be kidding me. What about the gazillion times when Australians sledged at will? From wikipedia:

In Australia and New Zealand, sledging is seen as fair game and part of masculine discourse. Adult males commonly insult each other as part of social relations, particularly in sport; they believe that "What's said on the pitch stays on the pitch". In this cultural context, sledging is not seen as a negative issue; those who complain about it are derided as immature and un-masculine.

From: Linky

As we have seen in this country over the last few days, sledging on the sporting field is neither a laughing nor a sporting matter. After untold years of on-field insult, racial and otherwise, it is Australia, of all nations, that can finally take no more.

So what happens if a brown man gets a victorious decision against white man in a race row? The brown man has money and hence pulled a fast one on the white man? That's ridiculous. Several times, on several occasions have Australian players gotten away with on- and off-field antics, sledging, arrogant behaviour (Ricky Ponting, say hello to Sharad Pawar), and what-not. There was a time when an Indian batsman slamming the bat to the ground after being dismissed constituted "showing disapproval of umpiring decisions". And now that Harbhajan calls someone a monkey it's a racial abuse? I have racially abused all my class-mates in India at some point of time then. Heck, we even have a monkey as a God.

In the entire media outrage around Australia, South Africa, parts of England, I see an undercurrent of the white man's feeling of superiority being threatened. Just because the white man ruled over 75% of the continent till about 30 years ago, doesn't mean the white man is always right.

"You know it white guy, we are coming for you. We pillage and plunder your jobs, wives and country. Bow down to us on and off the field, in cricket or otherwise, since you know who your master is now. The Indian hegemon is gaining on you. The Raos and the Patels are going to Idli-chutney your filet-mignons."

Yup, that's what the white man thinks, we think. What do we do about these poor devils with hurt egos? Pray for them. No bully likes to be tamed, cowed, dominated and sent whimpering back to the sandbox.

Diatribe: A Thunderous Verbal Attack

2008-01-26T13:32:00.000-08:00

This blog is a culmination of the fulminations that have been fuming inside my cranium. Following will be attacked with impassioned fervour:

Commercialism.
The Mediasaurus
Political apparatus in India and U.S.
Unnecessary social interaction.
Lack of attempt at accurate spelling.
Lack of items on this list.